The first thing I am going to say about me is, I'm a people person, I like to meet people and get to know them, I like to know all sorts of things about them. I like to connect with them in some way as I think this is one of life's experiences that is very rewarding and fulfilling and I enjoy it.
When I read something that has been written, I like to know something about the person behind the words, then it becomes more like a dialogue.
So I imagine if you have been reading what I have been writing you want to know more about me and who this person is, and you can become more involved in the conversation.
From some of what you have read you would have no idea about me at all.
I’m not going to tell you my whole life story, but I will tell you a lot. Firstly, my name is Leo Ryan and I was born in 1945, so at time of writing this I have just celebrated my 63rd birthday.
I am married for the second time and my partner and I have been together since 1984.
Now as soon as I say I have been married before, some of you will already be thinking how can I have any faith in this guy if he can’t work things out for himself?
How do I know that? Because I have come across this with some other people previously.
My response is, on the contrary, being in the position that we have both been in, as my ex partner was also a counselor like myself, we were able to recognize things were not okay between us and it was better that we separated.
Things were not disastrous, but we were not compatible in many ways and after being married for eleven years we decided it was best to separate.
We had three children and lost the first one at 4 months old from cot death. We have a son in his early thirties who is married with a young daughter and soon to have another child.
We have a daughter in her late twenties who was married recently.
There has been full cooperation between us at all times such as graduations, weddings etc. and the children’s needs have always had priority. When my ex partner moved to another city because of a job situation, we moved as well because of the children.
A couple of years ago I was having a chat with my daughter and at one stage during our conversation, almost out of the blue, she said to me “I don’t know how you and mum were ever together!” That was not judging either of us, simply saying she could see things about me and her, where, quite clearly we didn’t fit together as a couple.
I mentioned this to my son and I got a very matter-of-fact response, something like “Yes of course she’s right.”
We have both been remarried now for quite a long time and are with partners we are much more suited to and imagine we will remain so for the rest of our lives.
I was a counselor for twenty years and during that time I dealt with a broad range of issues. However I found a large number of my clients were women who were experiencing all types of abuse in their relationships.
This was all new to me, however my response was to become highly skilled at dealing with the issue to the extent that I came to be regarded as an expert in the area, and many thought about me as their first choice for referrals.
I have seen numerous clients, including victims, perpetrators and couples. I have also been involved in seminars, workshops and talks on the subject to a wide range of people in the community, including doctors, nurses, politicians, police, counselors, church groups and so on. I have also been interviewed by all sectors of the media about my work.
I have received a lot of praise for my work and many have encouraged me to write and share what I have learnt. It is an area I feel passionate about and given I have a lot to offer, this is what my aim is with this website.
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